...and I'm already done. The kids haven't been home even 24 hours and Wizard is already starting. TinMan had counseling last night, a good session minus the fact that he didn't read last week. The counselor said that things at home seem good from TinMan's perspective, he says he hasn't had any adjustment problems, he's not violent or cutting himself or anything crazy like that; he's not overly angry, isn't overly disrespectful or getting in trouble with the law.
I tell Wizard all this last night and he's overjoyed with the fact that TinMan is just a teenager...something I've been saying for a year now. My only concern was that the counselor didn't bring up the past, which is what the school psychologist said is most likely the problem but I planned to bring that up with the counselor to see what he thought.
Wizard calls just now of course middle of the work day, what better time to discuss my teenage son's counseling session, right?! He called to tell me that there HAS to be something wrong that lying to a teacher and lying to us and not doing homework or studying for tests can NOT be normal, LMAO....seriously?! I don't know what world her grew up in but honestly I lied to my parents, teachers, friends, etc when I was a teen, i think its part or becoming an individual..in fact I've read on several parenting sites that it IS part of becoming and individual and 'rebelling'; so TinMan's version of rebelling happens to be not studying....THANK YOU, at least he's not having sex (and yes I KNOW my son isn't having sex), doing drugs, cutting himself or others, beating up others, drinking or any of the other nonsense I worried about...no my son is NORMAL...THANK YOU! Basically I spent 10 mins on the phone listening to him complain about the counselor which let me tell you is fucking annoying.
We're AMAZING when it's just us or even just us and TinMan...but we're better when we're alone when the kids get factored in well it becomes a VERY difficult situation for me, I love them all and I give them all my love which means at the end of the day there's NOTHING leftover for Wizard or me and Wizard just doesn't get that; not sure how to help him understand but somehow he's got to!
In other news, not really as dramatic or stupid as not wearing helmets on the street but Witch bought Munchkin new tennis shoes which is GREAT however they're 1. white and 2. have to be tied. Now if you've ever had a 3 yr old you know that it's not easy to get them to sit still to put on shoes that velcro let alone shoes that freaking tie and as many times as I have to be the one to tie them, I wasn't happy. White for a 3 yr old is stupid, especially in spring...c'mon they'll be khaki before the end of April. I'm going to buy him new Cars shoes like the ones he had and was super happy about....and they velcro!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
aww poor baby...
...so now that Wizard yelled at Witch for not parenting she's being a true bitch to him but only hurting the kids. What is she doing, I know you're dying to know....well Lion got tickets to a game and Wizard said he'd take her but since it's Witch's week and she's still pissed off about her parenting being questioned she told Wizard no. The funny part is....Lion walks ALL over her mother so Lion will be going to the game with her father it's only a matter of time before Witch caves. The even funnier part is Wizard NEVER does this even when Witch tries to bait him into saying no to something on his week he never falls for it...another reason I love him.
Parenting..what is that?!
So after months and months of freedom from the Witches idiot parenting we have our metldown which also means that the Witch will be on a rampage since Wizard questioned her not once but several times.
Background, Glenda's car broke down yesterday and her other car needs new tires and she didn't feel comfortable driving the kids in it so she told Witch to bring the children to her house but she wouldn't be driving. Witch took the day off of work but bitched about it....not shocking. So Witch is home with the three kids, its spring break so she lets Lion have a friend over...good times! Well Lion and Scarecrow got these for Christmas....
This sleek, motorized Eurostyle scooter, available only at Toys R Us, comes equipped with two full range speakers and a docking station that is compatible with all current versions of the Apple iPod, so kids can cruise around the neighborhood as they listen to their favorite tunes. With its white exterior, the iMod is designed to match the classic, clean look of an iPod, while boasting 16" tires and over 10 miles of smooth cruising capability at speeds up to 15 mph on a single charge. The iMod also comes with an FM stereo so kids can tune into their favorite stations. Kids can lift the seat to reveal a special storage compartment. 2 rechargeable "12V Lead Acid" batteries required (included) and 4 "AA" batteries required (not included). Apple iPod not included. Weight limit 170 lbs.
Background, Glenda's car broke down yesterday and her other car needs new tires and she didn't feel comfortable driving the kids in it so she told Witch to bring the children to her house but she wouldn't be driving. Witch took the day off of work but bitched about it....not shocking. So Witch is home with the three kids, its spring break so she lets Lion have a friend over...good times! Well Lion and Scarecrow got these for Christmas....
This sleek, motorized Eurostyle scooter, available only at Toys R Us, comes equipped with two full range speakers and a docking station that is compatible with all current versions of the Apple iPod, so kids can cruise around the neighborhood as they listen to their favorite tunes. With its white exterior, the iMod is designed to match the classic, clean look of an iPod, while boasting 16" tires and over 10 miles of smooth cruising capability at speeds up to 15 mph on a single charge. The iMod also comes with an FM stereo so kids can tune into their favorite stations. Kids can lift the seat to reveal a special storage compartment. 2 rechargeable "12V Lead Acid" batteries required (included) and 4 "AA" batteries required (not included). Apple iPod not included. Weight limit 170 lbs.
Ok....so they get those for Christmas; please note the model in the picture has on a HELMET. So, yesterday Witch stayed home with the kids and let Lion have a friend over, well Lion, Scarecrow and friend all went outside and rode their scooters, harmless right?! Until the friend wrecks and messes up Scarecrow's scooter AND hurts herself, bruises and cuts AND NO HELMET....I repeat NO HELMET...did I mention that they're allowed to ride on the ROAD....on the ROAD. Witch claims that they're only allowed on her road but Glenda saw them on the street behind their house without supervision. How did Wizard find all this out? Lion's friend told him all about their day when he dropped off Scarecrow after practice and took the friend home...nice.
What else did he find out? That Munchkin (age 3) has been riding on the back WITHOUT a helmet...Witch's defense...I was right there. OMG, seriously, does she care about her kids and their safety? Wizard went off at first and Witch said she couldn't be outside every minute and didn't knwo they didn't have on helmets, LIE LIE LIE. She doesn't make them wear helmets, after Christmas Glenda asked for the rules and Witch told her they didn't have to wear helmets. So, not only is she an idiot for putting the girls at risk but she also puts her toddler at risk and Lion's friend. What she didn't understand was that if something happened to Lion's friend she is LIABLE, it's her responsibility financially, not to mention the mental weight it would have if she got seriously hurt. Wizard resorted to begging her to keep the kids safe, basically told her that their safety meant the world to him; she responded that she felt the same way, so he told her to act like, LMAO
What gets me is that she 1. doesn't make them wear helmets and 2. lets them ride on the road and claims they only ride on her road BUT yesterday they were at the ENTRANCE of the neighborhood, which intersects with a VERY busy road named after a fruit....it's bullshit. She didn't watch what they were doing at all and her defense against that was 'its no different than them riding their bikes at your house' LMAO YES, there's a BIG difference 1. they KNOW, no helmet, no bike and 2. they ASK before they leave and 3. check in when they're done...basically our rule is you can ride around twice and then I want to hear from you. Why the overprotectiveness well...because if we just let them go and never have them check in how do we know they're missing? We wouldn't and thats a problem.
The last thing...ever seen the show The Secret Life of the American Teenager...well Munchkin can sing the theme song and when I was watching it last week there were two teens in bed and it was assumed they'd had sex and he said to me I know they're naked under there and he got this giddy look on his face. 1. my fault for not thinking and letting him watch with me 2. why the hell would he have ANY clue what could've gone on in that scene and 3. how the hell does he know the theme song with this is the FIRST time I've watched that show with him in the room. 1. I will not watch this show when the kids are home or up and 2. because his mother used to call him Sexy Boy all the time and rub his body (sick if you ask me) and 3. because Witch admited they all watch the show together (11, 9 and 3) real smart. This is a great show for teens, meaning high schoolers but IMO it's not so great for her kids. She has no problem watching shows that are not age appropriate. So, Wizard had to again enforce the NO rule on that...why is it that she can't fucking parent, is it that hard? I mean I parent 24/7 and I'm never the good guy and I"m ok with it sometimes...not all the time but for now I'm not here to be their friend, not even TinMans I'm here to teach them to be good people and watch out for their best interests! Why did I bring this up...because Munchkin was getting dressed yesterday and asked him mom to take of her clothes and be sexy with him.....I can tell you that this did not come from my house and she tried to make it like it did...so when Witch asked Wizard he said 'maybe he got it from that show you let them watch'; her response 'there's not sex in that show' LMAO....liar! I know first hand and will be happy to point out episodes and scense where there's sex...idiot!
Monday, March 23, 2009
I must bitch
...what else is new, right?
Ok, my husband will be 40 this year and I'm planning a surprise party...mark your calendars for December 12, 2009. So, I email his parents, invite them even though I HATE his mother, she's a bipolar nutcase just like her daughter (details to follow); so I put myself out there even though this women didn't come to our wedding (she was mad at Wizard for telling his sister that their brother did nothing but talk shit about her)....she claims that's the reason she didn't come to our wedding...anyway, her answer about coming to Wizard's party....we'll see?! We'll see! I didn't share this with Wizard until I found out that she sent Scarecrow's birthday card (March 23 bday) to WITCH'S house?! WITCH'S...she didn't send it a few days early or even just send it to our house, HER son's home, NO, she sent it to the EX-wife that she hadn't talked to in FIVE FUCKING years until they got divorced!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! See my irritation? UGH! Not only that but Wizard and his family didn't have a relationship until last fall when I encouraged it after his grandmother died.....I encouraged him to reach out to his family, I reminded him that family was important and that I would be nothing without my crazy, annoying, hillbilly family and I really thought he should be with his family and they should be a part of his life.....but instead his mom and sister and brother's wife (more details to follow) all have sided with Witch...why, I have no idea other than Witch and the rest of them seem to think that Wizard is some controlling, anal, freak who is mean, etc. Now I know that my husband can be a bit over the top and he's pissed me off more than once and I've said mean things in my blogs/journals BUT he's really a GREAT guy, otherwise I wouldn't be married to him and wouldn't have my son as a part of his life.
Ok and not only have the sided with Witch against their own son...well not 'them' cause Wizard's dad didn't want Wizard to marry Witch in the first place, thought she was bad for him; little did he know just how bad. I could go into all the details and reasons why they're divorced but I won't...I'm trying to let some of that negativity go....but this stuff I'm really struggling with....His sister, sister-in-law and mom are all friends on Facebook...not with me, oh no, I'm just the homewrecker whore...they're friends with poor little innocent Witch, who has no idea why Wizard ever left her...of course it can't be her fault...no, it has to be the homewrecker, whores fault, right?!
Even I'm big enough to admit that when I got divorced that it was a JOINT venture...he didn't do everything wrong and neither did I, period. Are there things that I could've blamed him for, HELL YES and vice versa but we didn't play that game...but Witch, Oh Witch, she plays the sympathy card all the way to the bank and I'm so over it, so over being the 'bad guy', Wizard being the 'bad guy', it just pisses me off even though I know in my heart we're not the 'bad guys'. UGH
I'm sure there were great parts of their marriage, there were great parts of my first marriage but it ended and it's been THREE years....it's time to let go and move the fuck on....she still has their champagne glasses (the silver ones that look like a heart when put together) displayed in her new house!!!!!!! How creepy is that?! Also painted her house the same color as ours...she had family pictures taken AFTER she found out we were having them taken and get this...the colors she chose for them to wear...brown and cream...the colors we chose for us to wear cream and red.....so weird, so creepy, but that's not even the best part....they haven't had a family picture taken EVER, EVER....so why the spontaneous want for a family picture after 13 years of no family pictures? Me, I'm her worst nightmare, I do crafty things, paint things on my own, I have my own style, didn't hire a decorator to pick the colors for my rooms and then let me choose the shade I like best, I don't go shopping for 8 hours on Saturdays, I don't bitch non-stop, I don't have to have a brand new car every 1.5 years....because I'm a much better woman, mother and wife than she'll ever be....even if I don't always feel that way or see it that way, deep down buried within the negativity of my pissed offness (sp)....well now that I've got all that out...I'm going to try and pretend to work.
Ok, my husband will be 40 this year and I'm planning a surprise party...mark your calendars for December 12, 2009. So, I email his parents, invite them even though I HATE his mother, she's a bipolar nutcase just like her daughter (details to follow); so I put myself out there even though this women didn't come to our wedding (she was mad at Wizard for telling his sister that their brother did nothing but talk shit about her)....she claims that's the reason she didn't come to our wedding...anyway, her answer about coming to Wizard's party....we'll see?! We'll see! I didn't share this with Wizard until I found out that she sent Scarecrow's birthday card (March 23 bday) to WITCH'S house?! WITCH'S...she didn't send it a few days early or even just send it to our house, HER son's home, NO, she sent it to the EX-wife that she hadn't talked to in FIVE FUCKING years until they got divorced!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! See my irritation? UGH! Not only that but Wizard and his family didn't have a relationship until last fall when I encouraged it after his grandmother died.....I encouraged him to reach out to his family, I reminded him that family was important and that I would be nothing without my crazy, annoying, hillbilly family and I really thought he should be with his family and they should be a part of his life.....but instead his mom and sister and brother's wife (more details to follow) all have sided with Witch...why, I have no idea other than Witch and the rest of them seem to think that Wizard is some controlling, anal, freak who is mean, etc. Now I know that my husband can be a bit over the top and he's pissed me off more than once and I've said mean things in my blogs/journals BUT he's really a GREAT guy, otherwise I wouldn't be married to him and wouldn't have my son as a part of his life.
Ok and not only have the sided with Witch against their own son...well not 'them' cause Wizard's dad didn't want Wizard to marry Witch in the first place, thought she was bad for him; little did he know just how bad. I could go into all the details and reasons why they're divorced but I won't...I'm trying to let some of that negativity go....but this stuff I'm really struggling with....His sister, sister-in-law and mom are all friends on Facebook...not with me, oh no, I'm just the homewrecker whore...they're friends with poor little innocent Witch, who has no idea why Wizard ever left her...of course it can't be her fault...no, it has to be the homewrecker, whores fault, right?!
Even I'm big enough to admit that when I got divorced that it was a JOINT venture...he didn't do everything wrong and neither did I, period. Are there things that I could've blamed him for, HELL YES and vice versa but we didn't play that game...but Witch, Oh Witch, she plays the sympathy card all the way to the bank and I'm so over it, so over being the 'bad guy', Wizard being the 'bad guy', it just pisses me off even though I know in my heart we're not the 'bad guys'. UGH
I'm sure there were great parts of their marriage, there were great parts of my first marriage but it ended and it's been THREE years....it's time to let go and move the fuck on....she still has their champagne glasses (the silver ones that look like a heart when put together) displayed in her new house!!!!!!! How creepy is that?! Also painted her house the same color as ours...she had family pictures taken AFTER she found out we were having them taken and get this...the colors she chose for them to wear...brown and cream...the colors we chose for us to wear cream and red.....so weird, so creepy, but that's not even the best part....they haven't had a family picture taken EVER, EVER....so why the spontaneous want for a family picture after 13 years of no family pictures? Me, I'm her worst nightmare, I do crafty things, paint things on my own, I have my own style, didn't hire a decorator to pick the colors for my rooms and then let me choose the shade I like best, I don't go shopping for 8 hours on Saturdays, I don't bitch non-stop, I don't have to have a brand new car every 1.5 years....because I'm a much better woman, mother and wife than she'll ever be....even if I don't always feel that way or see it that way, deep down buried within the negativity of my pissed offness (sp)....well now that I've got all that out...I'm going to try and pretend to work.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Stressed Out...
...so I lost my cool last night...really lost my cool for no other reason than I just wanted to be left alone with NO responsibility at all. I ended up yelling and TinMan because he didn't feel he needed to study for Spanish and stomping my feet and going to bed like a pissed off teenager who was told NO by their parents. I'm not proud of this fact but I did get the voice of reason from Horse Whisperer who reminded me that I'm still learning and it's ok....below is a piece of her email that she sent me this morning after listening to my voicemail from this morning. I'm fine, I'm just rather stressed and feel that I really do suck at my 'job' as a parent/step-parent.
OK - I listened to it. Its fine to be on the meds. At least right now while you get everything pulled together later down the road when you are comfortable you can try to go off them again. Just think of it like a prop in yoga - you will use it for a while until you are comfortable enough with everything else in your life that you think you can handle it solo again. There is nothing bad about that. You are amazing!! You have so much that you are dealing with right now... superwoman couldn't handle what you do -so it’s no wonder you need help calming your nerves. I believe that when you have kids they develop in the timeframe that the parents need to develop with them. I know that if I had Filly right now it would be difficult because she would surely break my arms!! She is mobile and I wouldn't expect all that she gets into. When she came home - it was all I could take. She stayed where you put her and she was light. All I had to master was feeding her, changing her diaper loving her, and learning to wake up when she cries (the bare basic necessities). As she developed it took more I had to master all of that as well as helping her develop motor skills, talking, feeding herself, watching that she doesn't hurt herself, etc. They take more and more skills and energy from the parents each day as they develop. Then when you have a second kid - you have to manage a sports/activity schedule with your oldest and just feeding and changing the baby again - just the bare basics.... then more and more as the days go on. It’s kind of like lifting weights. You start with 5lbs... not 100lbs. It’s not that you can't do 100lbs eventually.... but you have to work up to it. You were dropped into the Arnold Classic and expected to lift 150lbs without the training. Dorothy - you have 4 kids... you went from you and TinMan to 4 kids and a husband (which I can argue takes as much attention as a small child). There is nothing wrong with needing some motrin to ease the muscle ache at night. Everyone else in your class has been training for 12 years and started with the 5lb weight - and you were dropped in mid competition lifting 150lbs. Once you get the 150lbs down (it will be 170lbs by that time because Munchkin will be in sports) you will be accustomed to it and you will be able to sleep without a muscle reliever. Does that make sense?
OK - I listened to it. Its fine to be on the meds. At least right now while you get everything pulled together later down the road when you are comfortable you can try to go off them again. Just think of it like a prop in yoga - you will use it for a while until you are comfortable enough with everything else in your life that you think you can handle it solo again. There is nothing bad about that. You are amazing!! You have so much that you are dealing with right now... superwoman couldn't handle what you do -so it’s no wonder you need help calming your nerves. I believe that when you have kids they develop in the timeframe that the parents need to develop with them. I know that if I had Filly right now it would be difficult because she would surely break my arms!! She is mobile and I wouldn't expect all that she gets into. When she came home - it was all I could take. She stayed where you put her and she was light. All I had to master was feeding her, changing her diaper loving her, and learning to wake up when she cries (the bare basic necessities). As she developed it took more I had to master all of that as well as helping her develop motor skills, talking, feeding herself, watching that she doesn't hurt herself, etc. They take more and more skills and energy from the parents each day as they develop. Then when you have a second kid - you have to manage a sports/activity schedule with your oldest and just feeding and changing the baby again - just the bare basics.... then more and more as the days go on. It’s kind of like lifting weights. You start with 5lbs... not 100lbs. It’s not that you can't do 100lbs eventually.... but you have to work up to it. You were dropped into the Arnold Classic and expected to lift 150lbs without the training. Dorothy - you have 4 kids... you went from you and TinMan to 4 kids and a husband (which I can argue takes as much attention as a small child). There is nothing wrong with needing some motrin to ease the muscle ache at night. Everyone else in your class has been training for 12 years and started with the 5lb weight - and you were dropped in mid competition lifting 150lbs. Once you get the 150lbs down (it will be 170lbs by that time because Munchkin will be in sports) you will be accustomed to it and you will be able to sleep without a muscle reliever. Does that make sense?
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Step-Mother's(parent) Bill of Rights
I found this on my new guilty pleasure Wicked Stepmom's blog...I'll comment below.
- I will be part of the decision-making process in my marriage and family at all times. **totally agree with 100%, it's my family and my life too.
- People outside the immediate family - including ex-wives, in-laws and adult children - cannot make plans that affect my life without my consent. **sure they can doesn't mean I'll be there.
- I will not be responsible for the welfare of children for whom I can set no limits. 100% agree...I can't discipline then I ain't responsible
- I must be consulted about which children will live with us, when they can visit and how long they will stay. this is bogus and rude; maybe a discussion around it but c'mon if you're marrying a man with children he's just that WITH CHILDREN...dumbass
- I will not be solely responsible for housework; chores will be distributed fairly. This is LAW in my house for everyone, not just the step kids
- I will be consulted regarding all family financial matters. True dat!
- Others may not violate my private space at home, nor take or use my possessions without my permission.
- I will never be treated as an "outsider" in my own home.
- My husband and stepchildren must treat me with respect.
- Our marriage is our first priority, and we will address all issues together.
Seriously the last four....unless you're a complete pile of mush and have no self respect these are a given of ANY person in your life...or maybe that's just me. I'm often accused of being a hard ass but whatever!
:) to :(
Why is it that when women have a bad day men are all 'weird'....they make a HUGE deal out of it, like we don't know how to handle things....seriously?! I know how to handle stress but today is a day when I'm just in general frustrated and my stupid ass husband says 'well at least I know what to expect'....how about you go fuck yourself.
Last evening was one of the BEST evenings I've had in a REALLY long time! Wizard took Lion to a friends to hit (she plays softball and this is what you'll hear about for the next 4-5 months) so they were gone for a couple of hours, Munchkin, Scarecrow and I took a walk around the block and then got their bikes out and rode 1/4 way around the block before turning around because Munchkin was tired LOL after that we got out the lacrosse sticks and they played a bit with the neighbor kids D and T; then we played croquet (sp) and then went and picked up TinMan from practice...good times. When TinMan got home he ate as did the other two and then took his shower so he didn't stink like a boy anymore, LOL Munchkin took a bath and then TinMan did his HW WITHOUT argument....read again WITHOUT argument!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay! My night was complete.
Now, no night is complete with out bickering with the husband or bitching about Lion...whom I spent all of maybe an hour with all evening. So we're all in our room looking over the papers I just received from a friend about a big game, we've picked out different things to frame for each child's room as well as Wizard's office. Lion asks if she can have one...now to frame this stuff isn't cheap because its custom mat so I asked her if she was getting it because everyone else was or because she really wanted it to show her pride and she asked if it would match her room and I answered her no and she made a smartass comment about "well it doesn't matter anyway because it's been 8 months and my room isn't painted yet." It takes a certain amount of balls to say something like that to me and Scarecrow's eyes popped out of her head, I look at Lion and said you know...thanks for appreciating me, it's comments like that that make me not want to paint your room...she walked out of the room. I packed up the rest of the papers and took Munchkin to bed since it was 9pm. As Wizard and I are putting Munchkin to bed he asks what's wrong, I say nothing but he pushes and I start to tell him and mid sentence he cuts me off and says I don't want to hear it...so I shut up. For the next hour we debated...not argued but debated about Lion being disrespectful to me, I'm done. Basically I'm in no mood to do the room, 1. we save for everything we do and 2. I'd rather do Scarecrow's room where it will be appreciated. Lion does nothing but the find the negative in EVERY situation and I'm so over that bullshit it's not even funny. This morning she came into our bathroom while we were getting ready and I was like dude it's 8:10 you need to get moving, she says there's not bowls, I was like then get one out of the dishwasher, it says clean on it....her response 'well the weren't clean last night'. Wizard says I'm overreacting and maybe I am but I'm not going to take the smartass stuff....I'll just distance myself from her and she can be BFFs with her mother...period. She can live in the lemon yellow room with flowers until SHE'S ready to paint it.......
That's all...I thought this was going to be a positive post....guess not.
Last evening was one of the BEST evenings I've had in a REALLY long time! Wizard took Lion to a friends to hit (she plays softball and this is what you'll hear about for the next 4-5 months) so they were gone for a couple of hours, Munchkin, Scarecrow and I took a walk around the block and then got their bikes out and rode 1/4 way around the block before turning around because Munchkin was tired LOL after that we got out the lacrosse sticks and they played a bit with the neighbor kids D and T; then we played croquet (sp) and then went and picked up TinMan from practice...good times. When TinMan got home he ate as did the other two and then took his shower so he didn't stink like a boy anymore, LOL Munchkin took a bath and then TinMan did his HW WITHOUT argument....read again WITHOUT argument!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay! My night was complete.
Now, no night is complete with out bickering with the husband or bitching about Lion...whom I spent all of maybe an hour with all evening. So we're all in our room looking over the papers I just received from a friend about a big game, we've picked out different things to frame for each child's room as well as Wizard's office. Lion asks if she can have one...now to frame this stuff isn't cheap because its custom mat so I asked her if she was getting it because everyone else was or because she really wanted it to show her pride and she asked if it would match her room and I answered her no and she made a smartass comment about "well it doesn't matter anyway because it's been 8 months and my room isn't painted yet." It takes a certain amount of balls to say something like that to me and Scarecrow's eyes popped out of her head, I look at Lion and said you know...thanks for appreciating me, it's comments like that that make me not want to paint your room...she walked out of the room. I packed up the rest of the papers and took Munchkin to bed since it was 9pm. As Wizard and I are putting Munchkin to bed he asks what's wrong, I say nothing but he pushes and I start to tell him and mid sentence he cuts me off and says I don't want to hear it...so I shut up. For the next hour we debated...not argued but debated about Lion being disrespectful to me, I'm done. Basically I'm in no mood to do the room, 1. we save for everything we do and 2. I'd rather do Scarecrow's room where it will be appreciated. Lion does nothing but the find the negative in EVERY situation and I'm so over that bullshit it's not even funny. This morning she came into our bathroom while we were getting ready and I was like dude it's 8:10 you need to get moving, she says there's not bowls, I was like then get one out of the dishwasher, it says clean on it....her response 'well the weren't clean last night'. Wizard says I'm overreacting and maybe I am but I'm not going to take the smartass stuff....I'll just distance myself from her and she can be BFFs with her mother...period. She can live in the lemon yellow room with flowers until SHE'S ready to paint it.......
That's all...I thought this was going to be a positive post....guess not.
Friday, March 13, 2009
SUV
WOO HOO....I'm finally driving my Yukon XL and I LOVE IT!
I will post pictures when I get a chance to take pictures with my real camera and not my phone. I'm super excited!!!!!!! Not only do we have a car that fits all six of us, but it has DVD AND VHS and it's got lots of cargo space, leather seats, and all the other fun stuff. One thing I will miss about the Alero...the sunroom but I'm ok :)
Wizard told me last night after we got home from the dealer....honey, you look different in that SUV, you look like a mom, LMAO I about died laughing. I love him, he's such a nerd! I think he's more excited than I am; he told me this AM that he was just happy that we finally have something for ME, that I LOVE!
The best part...we paid cash....cash! It's used so we didn't pay like 30k cash we paid under 10k...so I'm really proud of that fact!!! We've been busting our asses for over a year now and have paid off all our personal debt and now only have the business debt to pay off and we'll be debt free minus our home by...get this...drum roll please......................this time NEXT year...2010...how effing GREAT is that?! Then we'll save six months of our expenses and then retirement...nice!
I'd just like to know at what point did I become a grown up?!
I will post pictures when I get a chance to take pictures with my real camera and not my phone. I'm super excited!!!!!!! Not only do we have a car that fits all six of us, but it has DVD AND VHS and it's got lots of cargo space, leather seats, and all the other fun stuff. One thing I will miss about the Alero...the sunroom but I'm ok :)
Wizard told me last night after we got home from the dealer....honey, you look different in that SUV, you look like a mom, LMAO I about died laughing. I love him, he's such a nerd! I think he's more excited than I am; he told me this AM that he was just happy that we finally have something for ME, that I LOVE!
The best part...we paid cash....cash! It's used so we didn't pay like 30k cash we paid under 10k...so I'm really proud of that fact!!! We've been busting our asses for over a year now and have paid off all our personal debt and now only have the business debt to pay off and we'll be debt free minus our home by...get this...drum roll please......................this time NEXT year...2010...how effing GREAT is that?! Then we'll save six months of our expenses and then retirement...nice!
I'd just like to know at what point did I become a grown up?!
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Interesting
I'm searching parenting and lying teens online and found this from a parent...sound like anyone I know?
"How about a child who is from a very loving home where the parents are both there for the 17 yr old girl who lies just to lie. Told someone her dad has hit her and she is afraid of him- not true. Told someone that her parents kicked her out of the house- I can’t remember the last time she was restricted,she has not gotten into any trouble. Told her boyfriend, now ex, that she had tried to take her life and had to spend the night at a mental health facility. Also told him during their relationship that she neve ate. SHe has admitted to liking to lie"
Lion admitted that she could lie to anyone, anytime and never get caught....and that she does it and is proud of it....hope this isn't Wizard, and I in about 6 years.
"How about a child who is from a very loving home where the parents are both there for the 17 yr old girl who lies just to lie. Told someone her dad has hit her and she is afraid of him- not true. Told someone that her parents kicked her out of the house- I can’t remember the last time she was restricted,she has not gotten into any trouble. Told her boyfriend, now ex, that she had tried to take her life and had to spend the night at a mental health facility. Also told him during their relationship that she neve ate. SHe has admitted to liking to lie"
Lion admitted that she could lie to anyone, anytime and never get caught....and that she does it and is proud of it....hope this isn't Wizard, and I in about 6 years.
Happy Stuff!
So I rambled and bitched and totally forgot to post the good stuff...
1. Child support was reduced about $200 woo hoo!!! Could go lower but we're happy with this.
2. I got my SUV...yay!!!
So that's the good stuff...unless you count the laundry's done and the cleaning lady comes tomorrow, LOL
OH a few additions :)
Interesting morning conversation with Wizard today....Witch punished Lion...which in my world is VERY unheard of...but I guess Lion is pushing her luck at mommy's too; apparently Witch told her no more computer in the morning and Lion felt the need to not listen, so she was sent to her room and had the phone and computer taken away for the day and I guess Lion's smartass remark to Witch went something like this 'Munchkin never gets in trouble, all you do is yell at me'....LMAO WHATEVER, that little girl has NO clue! She tends to kiss ass when she gets in trouble, with lots of I love you's and I'm sorry's so we shall see how this one ends. She'll be with Wizard all weekend for a sports thing...they often clash without a buffer between them....
Oh and here's an interesting article about teens and grades
http://pleasestoptherollercoaster.com/blog/2008/10/31/worried-about-your-teens-poor-grades/
1. Child support was reduced about $200 woo hoo!!! Could go lower but we're happy with this.
2. I got my SUV...yay!!!
So that's the good stuff...unless you count the laundry's done and the cleaning lady comes tomorrow, LOL
OH a few additions :)
Interesting morning conversation with Wizard today....Witch punished Lion...which in my world is VERY unheard of...but I guess Lion is pushing her luck at mommy's too; apparently Witch told her no more computer in the morning and Lion felt the need to not listen, so she was sent to her room and had the phone and computer taken away for the day and I guess Lion's smartass remark to Witch went something like this 'Munchkin never gets in trouble, all you do is yell at me'....LMAO WHATEVER, that little girl has NO clue! She tends to kiss ass when she gets in trouble, with lots of I love you's and I'm sorry's so we shall see how this one ends. She'll be with Wizard all weekend for a sports thing...they often clash without a buffer between them....
Oh and here's an interesting article about teens and grades
http://pleasestoptherollercoaster.com/blog/2008/10/31/worried-about-your-teens-poor-grades/
What's my issue?
Well...there are so many at this point that I've lost count but what sort of set me 'off' last night was Wizard and Tin Man...I'm much calmer now and really just go whatever about the whole thing but I really need to 'blog it out' as the Tuesday's and I have decided to name it.
Tin Man has decided to 'give up' again, not sure why but he has...I personally think it has to do with a small dose of a reality check...this will require background so bear with me while I write a dissertation of the past....Tin Man grew up with his maternal grandparents and my brother; he lived there for 13 years and came to me every other weekend and I went to him often, like soccer and baseball games and school plays etc. My brother is significantly younger than I am; we'll say he's closer to Tin Man's age than mine so they basically grew up together and when they separated two years ago Tin Man stayed there mentally instead of allowing himself to move forward (not on) and add additional friends to his life. My brother moved forward, he's joined the band in HS, has a girlfriend and a few good friends but the point is he moved forward and I think Tin Man is having a VERY hard time with that. Typically he goes to Granny's and LOVES it, has a blast, can't stop talking about it and just in general is overly excited about the fact that he's going there; well last week he went for my bro's bday; Munchkin and I took him there (it's about an hour from where we live in Oz) and my bro's g/f was there...strike one and my bro's best friend and his g/f were there, strike two and there was only one other guy there aside from Tyler that was single and that was his 14 year old cousin...TinMan wasn't happy, I could tell but I wasn't going to dwell so Munchkin Auntie and I went and played outside and had a blast, when it was time to leave, my bro, his g/f, his best friend and g/f were outside on the trampoline and TinMan was inside watching a movie....VERY odd, I asked what was wrong he said nothing just a little tired...which would be understandable since he played a game earlier but there was something off; I didn't know what was off until he came home the following day.
After TinMan came home we had to go to counseling and while he was in his session I overhead the doc ask him if he had fun at his grandmas and TinMan answered 'it was ok'. I have NEVER ever heard him answer like that before, ever! When he came home he seemed somewhat relieved, it was so freaking odd! So, I think over the last several weeks (because this is the second time in 2-3 weeks that he's gone there) he's realized that my bro has moved forward whereas he's stayed put....and I've been through this feeling and it hurts, especially if you're secretly counting on that person (the one that moved on) to be your 'rock'; which I think TinMan was doing.
The problem? Well, we have him get his student planner signed by all his teachers except one and in the past month he has been forging his Spanish teachers initials, which is odd because we haven't been giving him a hard time, in fact we've been on top of tests, etc but not been punishing or anything like that....we were told that wouldn't help and it was clear that what we were doing before was NOT helping him but pissing him off; so we changed things up. So, he's forging his Spanish teachers initials AND he LIED to his Spanish teacher about his speech, he had a speech due Monday, which I made certain he completed and practiced (not in front of me because he refused) before he left for my moms last weekend, so I knew it was done, I saw it; on Tuesday she emailed me and told me that TinMan refused to give his speech in class on Tuesday when his name was called, he claimed he didn't ahve it (LIE) and when she said 'thats ok you should know it from practicing' he lied again and said he never did it. So now I have THREE lies, spanish teacher initials, and two lies to the spanish teacher herself....how do I deal with this? No freaking clue! I thought we were making GREAT progress but I guess I was wrong OR he's just being a teen...but how do I know he's just being a teen?
So all that lead up to last night...oh and SUV shopping...which is over because I have my SUV, picking it up tonight YAY! I have other good news but let me finish purging....so Monday TinMan came home from practice, said all his work was done and Cougar wanted us to come to her new house, so we did, I bought him Quizno's for dinner and we hung out there for about an hour...he seemed to have a good time with Mr. Cougar but who knows. Tuesday the Tuesday's (LMAO) had a celebration happy hour for our Puma who is newly engaged and then we went over to Cougar's house again to check it out...plus it's on my way home, LOL I ended up staying until about 10pm so I didn't see TinMan Tuesday, Wizard said he (TinMan) was needy so I'm thinking the attitude I got last night was because of my abscence on Tuesday....I know what he's thinking because he has voiced; basically when the Wizard's kids are there, I have to be home most of the time especially since sports are kicking back up, dinners have to be planned for Glenda to cook but when they're not there, I'm a slacker, I try so hard not to be but it's really hard so I think that's where problem #2 he feels like I don't give a crap...and I do....ok back to my thought. TinMan got out of practice at 6pm yesterday instead of 8pm, I didn't know this but Wizard did and Wizard told TinMan he would pick him and his friend up...didn't happen since Wizard took Scarecrow up North...and for whatever reason TinMan didn't call me, they called his friends parents to pick them up...I was shopping at Old Navy...I thought I had LOTS of time, I got home at 6:30p with plans to cook a yummy healthy dinner for all and TinMan was there...and not happy. I asked why he didn't call me, he said he didn't knwo but that Wizard said he would pick them up and when he didn't show they called his friends parents...now I look like a slacker parent (great)....so I ask if he wanted pork chops for dinner...yum, no; grilled cheese and soup, no; pizza, no; spaghetti, no; bbq chicken, no; I was like ok then...I'm not cooking if you're not going to tell me what you want. So he makes himself a sandwich, a mini pizza and eats pretzels with it, fine. I try to make conversation...see how his day and yesterday was, I get one word answers, I try to pry a little more, still one word answers then I ask if he's excited aobut going to his granny's this weekend....eh, I guess, there's nothing better to do. Now that is a new response to that question, usually he's over the moon about it...now he'll be pissed because he has to stay home with me and do homework, etc. Oh well.
That's part 1...part 2 comes from Wizard calling me and I was in the middle of my brooding about my child's lack of interest in ANYTHING and he starts asking me questions, I apprently didn't answer them in the tone he had hoped for so he starts 'whats wrong with you, why are you moody, I swear all you do is bitch' and blah, blah blah...so I hung up, LOL After that I was just done with the day; TinMan went to bed at like 8;30p because he said he had nothing better to do...and Wizard came home and I left to get cat food.....I just couldn't deal with anything else.
Wizard started telling me how I needed to discuss with TinMan about lying again and I really wanted to snap since Lion constantly lies and nothing is ever done but I didn't, I just kept chanting in my head I lvoe you...I really did this. After that things were 'ok'; I'm still wondering what to do to help TinMan and wondering where I 'failed' if that makes any sense...logically I know I didn't fail at anything, emotionally I think I've messed my kid up for life and really would like a do-over...can you have do-over's with your life?!
Tin Man has decided to 'give up' again, not sure why but he has...I personally think it has to do with a small dose of a reality check...this will require background so bear with me while I write a dissertation of the past....Tin Man grew up with his maternal grandparents and my brother; he lived there for 13 years and came to me every other weekend and I went to him often, like soccer and baseball games and school plays etc. My brother is significantly younger than I am; we'll say he's closer to Tin Man's age than mine so they basically grew up together and when they separated two years ago Tin Man stayed there mentally instead of allowing himself to move forward (not on) and add additional friends to his life. My brother moved forward, he's joined the band in HS, has a girlfriend and a few good friends but the point is he moved forward and I think Tin Man is having a VERY hard time with that. Typically he goes to Granny's and LOVES it, has a blast, can't stop talking about it and just in general is overly excited about the fact that he's going there; well last week he went for my bro's bday; Munchkin and I took him there (it's about an hour from where we live in Oz) and my bro's g/f was there...strike one and my bro's best friend and his g/f were there, strike two and there was only one other guy there aside from Tyler that was single and that was his 14 year old cousin...TinMan wasn't happy, I could tell but I wasn't going to dwell so Munchkin Auntie and I went and played outside and had a blast, when it was time to leave, my bro, his g/f, his best friend and g/f were outside on the trampoline and TinMan was inside watching a movie....VERY odd, I asked what was wrong he said nothing just a little tired...which would be understandable since he played a game earlier but there was something off; I didn't know what was off until he came home the following day.
After TinMan came home we had to go to counseling and while he was in his session I overhead the doc ask him if he had fun at his grandmas and TinMan answered 'it was ok'. I have NEVER ever heard him answer like that before, ever! When he came home he seemed somewhat relieved, it was so freaking odd! So, I think over the last several weeks (because this is the second time in 2-3 weeks that he's gone there) he's realized that my bro has moved forward whereas he's stayed put....and I've been through this feeling and it hurts, especially if you're secretly counting on that person (the one that moved on) to be your 'rock'; which I think TinMan was doing.
The problem? Well, we have him get his student planner signed by all his teachers except one and in the past month he has been forging his Spanish teachers initials, which is odd because we haven't been giving him a hard time, in fact we've been on top of tests, etc but not been punishing or anything like that....we were told that wouldn't help and it was clear that what we were doing before was NOT helping him but pissing him off; so we changed things up. So, he's forging his Spanish teachers initials AND he LIED to his Spanish teacher about his speech, he had a speech due Monday, which I made certain he completed and practiced (not in front of me because he refused) before he left for my moms last weekend, so I knew it was done, I saw it; on Tuesday she emailed me and told me that TinMan refused to give his speech in class on Tuesday when his name was called, he claimed he didn't ahve it (LIE) and when she said 'thats ok you should know it from practicing' he lied again and said he never did it. So now I have THREE lies, spanish teacher initials, and two lies to the spanish teacher herself....how do I deal with this? No freaking clue! I thought we were making GREAT progress but I guess I was wrong OR he's just being a teen...but how do I know he's just being a teen?
So all that lead up to last night...oh and SUV shopping...which is over because I have my SUV, picking it up tonight YAY! I have other good news but let me finish purging....so Monday TinMan came home from practice, said all his work was done and Cougar wanted us to come to her new house, so we did, I bought him Quizno's for dinner and we hung out there for about an hour...he seemed to have a good time with Mr. Cougar but who knows. Tuesday the Tuesday's (LMAO) had a celebration happy hour for our Puma who is newly engaged and then we went over to Cougar's house again to check it out...plus it's on my way home, LOL I ended up staying until about 10pm so I didn't see TinMan Tuesday, Wizard said he (TinMan) was needy so I'm thinking the attitude I got last night was because of my abscence on Tuesday....I know what he's thinking because he has voiced; basically when the Wizard's kids are there, I have to be home most of the time especially since sports are kicking back up, dinners have to be planned for Glenda to cook but when they're not there, I'm a slacker, I try so hard not to be but it's really hard so I think that's where problem #2 he feels like I don't give a crap...and I do....ok back to my thought. TinMan got out of practice at 6pm yesterday instead of 8pm, I didn't know this but Wizard did and Wizard told TinMan he would pick him and his friend up...didn't happen since Wizard took Scarecrow up North...and for whatever reason TinMan didn't call me, they called his friends parents to pick them up...I was shopping at Old Navy...I thought I had LOTS of time, I got home at 6:30p with plans to cook a yummy healthy dinner for all and TinMan was there...and not happy. I asked why he didn't call me, he said he didn't knwo but that Wizard said he would pick them up and when he didn't show they called his friends parents...now I look like a slacker parent (great)....so I ask if he wanted pork chops for dinner...yum, no; grilled cheese and soup, no; pizza, no; spaghetti, no; bbq chicken, no; I was like ok then...I'm not cooking if you're not going to tell me what you want. So he makes himself a sandwich, a mini pizza and eats pretzels with it, fine. I try to make conversation...see how his day and yesterday was, I get one word answers, I try to pry a little more, still one word answers then I ask if he's excited aobut going to his granny's this weekend....eh, I guess, there's nothing better to do. Now that is a new response to that question, usually he's over the moon about it...now he'll be pissed because he has to stay home with me and do homework, etc. Oh well.
That's part 1...part 2 comes from Wizard calling me and I was in the middle of my brooding about my child's lack of interest in ANYTHING and he starts asking me questions, I apprently didn't answer them in the tone he had hoped for so he starts 'whats wrong with you, why are you moody, I swear all you do is bitch' and blah, blah blah...so I hung up, LOL After that I was just done with the day; TinMan went to bed at like 8;30p because he said he had nothing better to do...and Wizard came home and I left to get cat food.....I just couldn't deal with anything else.
Wizard started telling me how I needed to discuss with TinMan about lying again and I really wanted to snap since Lion constantly lies and nothing is ever done but I didn't, I just kept chanting in my head I lvoe you...I really did this. After that things were 'ok'; I'm still wondering what to do to help TinMan and wondering where I 'failed' if that makes any sense...logically I know I didn't fail at anything, emotionally I think I've messed my kid up for life and really would like a do-over...can you have do-over's with your life?!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
boys are stupid...
...I tell Wizard that Cougar got flowers from her husband to celebrate their new house and he tells me if we have sex two nights in a row I can get flowers too....
The funny thing is he did NOT used to be like this; in fact I was once the girl who got random flowers, small gifts and cards for NO reason at all....funny how things changed when we got serious. True colors, that's all I've got to say.
The funny thing is he did NOT used to be like this; in fact I was once the girl who got random flowers, small gifts and cards for NO reason at all....funny how things changed when we got serious. True colors, that's all I've got to say.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Random
I'm at Tin Mans counseling appt and reading step motherhood good book! But anyway, drop off is over and done and oddly I don't feel the relief I typically feel..I think that's probably good.
Lion and I had one final disagreement before she left...her room ugh! This girl is sloppy she shoves clothes in drawers and throws clothes on her floor ugh! If you know me this drives me nuts!!! So I asked her to clean her room before going toger moms and she tells me its clean ugh! Why do they always argue?! She did go do it with minimal arguing after I told her I was going to stop folding her clothes and just put them in her room since she didn't care. My way of saying I'm not taking my valuable time folding YOUR laundry if its going to get thrown on the floor!
Oh she did really bug me today..we told her that we would repaint her room this winter/spring and got her a new duvet and pillow shams for her bday 200 so we didn't paint her room at that time so today she asks me AGAIN if we're ever going to redo her room. I didn't really lik that it hurt my feelings and frustrated me! I told her yes but it would take time. Because neither of her parents have taught her that sometimes you have to wait for things you want she just keeps asking until she gets her way. VERY frustrating!!
I'm going to post some of my old posts from another blog it will give some background.
Lion and I had one final disagreement before she left...her room ugh! This girl is sloppy she shoves clothes in drawers and throws clothes on her floor ugh! If you know me this drives me nuts!!! So I asked her to clean her room before going toger moms and she tells me its clean ugh! Why do they always argue?! She did go do it with minimal arguing after I told her I was going to stop folding her clothes and just put them in her room since she didn't care. My way of saying I'm not taking my valuable time folding YOUR laundry if its going to get thrown on the floor!
Oh she did really bug me today..we told her that we would repaint her room this winter/spring and got her a new duvet and pillow shams for her bday 200 so we didn't paint her room at that time so today she asks me AGAIN if we're ever going to redo her room. I didn't really lik that it hurt my feelings and frustrated me! I told her yes but it would take time. Because neither of her parents have taught her that sometimes you have to wait for things you want she just keeps asking until she gets her way. VERY frustrating!!
I'm going to post some of my old posts from another blog it will give some background.
Never surprised....
...ever seen the show Fringe? It's a new show on Fox, airs at 9pm , as its for mature audiences...in fact the episode i'm watching right now had everyone bleeding from the eyes and a woman's head exploded; I'm watching it on hulu (my new obsession). Anyway, Lion...always the one with the info is kind enough to tell me that she's already seen this episode...nice! Makes me all giddy inside knowing that 1. there's no bedtime at the Witch's house and 2. that they get to watch shows like Fringe, Criminal Minds and House at will....with the Witch!!!!!
I have to seriously learn how to let this stuff go and not care because I'm livid right now; I never thought to allow TinMan to watch stuff like this...maybe I needed to allow him more 'color' or something and that's why he's a little immatrue but here's the thing IMO, he has so many years to be 'mature' so why force it; in fact Lion is so mature that Witch is her best frien, Lion knows how much Witch's car payment is, and that she pays for most things with her credit cards as well as the fact that she didn't want Munchkin to go to preschool last fall because she couldn't afford her portion of the tuition (approx. $40/month)....giving up smoking could be the $40/month that one needs for tuition, right?! I'm driving the bitter bus right now because I just can't get over the fact that this woman claims I'm the bad influence because I took Lion and Scarecrow with my Tuesday's to see the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2; why was that bad, because the condom broke in the movie and we learned a valuable lesson about unwanted pregnancy...don't have sex. I'm not naive enough to believe that they won't have sex before marriage but I can hope that they'll be well informed and make the choice for themselves not some stupid boy...but back to my original thought....she buys their love...took Lion shopping two weeks ago while Scarecrow and Wizard were at practice; lied to Scarecrow...told her that Lion had gift cards left over from Christmas and Birthday...Scarecrow saw the receipts laying on the counter the next day and looked at the payment method (smart for a 9 year old) and it was VISA...not gift cards but VISA and Glenda told me Scarecrow was PISSED!!!! Interesting...nice thing to teach...lying. Unfortunately because it happened on Witch's week so Wizard isn't willing to say anything to Witch because it's her house, her rules. Fair enough because I wouldn't want her up in my business so I get that...but GRRRR.
I have to seriously learn how to let this stuff go and not care because I'm livid right now; I never thought to allow TinMan to watch stuff like this...maybe I needed to allow him more 'color' or something and that's why he's a little immatrue but here's the thing IMO, he has so many years to be 'mature' so why force it; in fact Lion is so mature that Witch is her best frien, Lion knows how much Witch's car payment is, and that she pays for most things with her credit cards as well as the fact that she didn't want Munchkin to go to preschool last fall because she couldn't afford her portion of the tuition (approx. $40/month)....giving up smoking could be the $40/month that one needs for tuition, right?! I'm driving the bitter bus right now because I just can't get over the fact that this woman claims I'm the bad influence because I took Lion and Scarecrow with my Tuesday's to see the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2; why was that bad, because the condom broke in the movie and we learned a valuable lesson about unwanted pregnancy...don't have sex. I'm not naive enough to believe that they won't have sex before marriage but I can hope that they'll be well informed and make the choice for themselves not some stupid boy...but back to my original thought....she buys their love...took Lion shopping two weeks ago while Scarecrow and Wizard were at practice; lied to Scarecrow...told her that Lion had gift cards left over from Christmas and Birthday...Scarecrow saw the receipts laying on the counter the next day and looked at the payment method (smart for a 9 year old) and it was VISA...not gift cards but VISA and Glenda told me Scarecrow was PISSED!!!! Interesting...nice thing to teach...lying. Unfortunately because it happened on Witch's week so Wizard isn't willing to say anything to Witch because it's her house, her rules. Fair enough because I wouldn't want her up in my business so I get that...but GRRRR.
Lacrosse, grannies, and Movies....
...Oh boy, alot has happened in two days and most of it is fun but there's also some frustrations. Satruday started out as any other Saturday with the Wizard's children at home does; Munchkin coming into our room at around 7am to tell us he has to pee...and then one of us gets up, this weekend it was me :) and :( I wasn't really tired but didn't really feel like being awake either. The morning was sort of slow going but overall uneventful, Tin Man had a lacrosse game an 1pm; the Wizard, Lion and Scarecrow had softball practice at 1pm and the Lion had a soccer game at noon, so it was a busy day of sorts...no busier than normal though. Wizard, Lion and Scarecrow all went to Lion's soccer game while TinMan and Munchkin stayed with me and went to TinMan's lax game...
Tin Man's lax game was fun as it was an inter-team game and Tin Man's team won, not sure by how much but they did and better yet he got a lot of playing time which was a good surprise to him. Munchkin was super good basically just ran up and down the hill at the field the whole time and planted 'trees' (grass) in my chair and watered them with my keys, LOL He's one funny kid! After the lax game we headed to grannies for my brother's birthday, good times. TinMan and Munchkin were pretty funny on the way there...just playing with each other, you'd never know there were 13 years between them :) Once we got there the fun really began, Munchkin LOVES grannies, there's a sand box with 'diggers' and lots of room to run, two dogs and a slide oh and trampoline :) He bounced, dug, ran and slid for a solid hour and then slept the whole way home!
We arrived home to a clean house :) I love it when Wizard surprises me and does 'chores', it makes me feel loved and more like I have a partner than just a husband! It's nice to have help! Wizard and I decided that we would take Lion, Scarecrow and Munchkin to the $1.50 movies...or $2 movie since the price went up....Lion and Scarecrow went to see Bride Wars and Wizard, Munchkin and I went to see Marley and Me...definite owner! I LOVED the movie, it was so awesome, not just the story of the dog and his owner or companion but the whole family! GREAT MOVIE! Munchkin was REALLY GOOD, no talking, whining or crying at all....I was so proud of him! Lion and Scarecrow were good too and enjoyed their movie. OH, Munchkin started giggling whenever the couple would kiss...how funny...gonna have to watch out for that one!
I have to admit that I was really tense at the thought of all of us going to the movies, but I relaxed a bit after we were all settled. It was a nice outting and I didn't feel like I had to do it all...that's one thing the book Step Motherhood is teaching me, I don't have to do it all! I'm a control freak by nature and I like things organized, neat and tidy so if I have a choice of teaching or doing; I'll do it myself instead of worrying about whether its done my way or not...something I'm slowly learning to let go of...hard but I'm moving in the right direction. Watching Marley and Me also taught me to let Wizard do more with the kids, I tend to step in if he's not doing it my way...much like Jen did to Owen when he's trying to change their middle son's diaper. Life is a learning experience that's for sure!
So now it's Sunday...drop off day and also another softball practice for Scarecrow and Wizard. they have to travel an hour away to practice and it's a pretty long practice; four hours, they only practice once a month. So...they left at 11am and won't be home until 6pm.....in the past Wizard has asked me to drop off Lion and Munchking to WWW but today he said she could wait until he was able to bring them home; I simply said Thank You! I really meant it too.
Drop off for me is hard for me because I have been harboring so much hate for WWW in the past six months, not sure why but I am and I'm slowly stepping back from certain things until I get it under control. Not to mention there are things that are NOT in my 'job' description and pickup/drop off is one of them! However, in Wizard's 'defense' I've never said i hated it, i just always bitched and something that we've both learned in the last week is that we need to LISTEN to each other more, not just yell or bitch but really LISTEN espeically when it comes to the children. I have a habit of shutting down when he tries to talk about Tyler and he has a habit of getting angry and yelling when I try to talk about any of his kids...especially Lion. His defense is always 'they get good grades and play sports' and my rebuttal is always 'getting good grades and playing sports doesn't make you a good person' and this argument has been going on for about two months now and I'm really glad that we're agreeing to work on communicating regarding our kids. This is our biggest issue! I've explained that he really needs to listen because if he doesn't; like in the past I won't talk and lately I haven't been talking and he's realized that...so cross your fingers! I'm really working on not letting things get to me so easily...I can go from 0 to bitch in about two seconds!
That's been the weekend, nothing overly eventful but life just the same. I'm doing laundry, Lion is out side with her Best Munchkin and Munchkin is napping so it's nice and quiet!
OHHHHHHHHHHH can't believe I forgot this!!! Wizards SIL (Wicked Witch of the East) stopped by to deliver Girl Scout Cookies from his niece; I haven't seen her since our wedding and the ONLY reason she came to our wedding is because Wizards parents were going to be there and she wanted to remian in their good graces....they have money and she wants some of it when they die...whatever! So, Wizard didn't leave money so I had to write a check; she did not step inside our house until I told her she could come in...now 1. I'm surprise she didn't have her daughter drop off the cookies and 2. she knows I hate her...but I'm good at being civil; i have lots of pratice with WWW; so I invited WWE so I could write the check...she made small talk but whatever...she is as bad as WWE if not worse, she befriended me and then stabbed me in the back; she's BFF's with WWW after she said so many awful and mean things about her and WWW about WWE...they're two peas in a pod and they can have each other! Maybe Wizard's bipolar nut job of a sister will join them considering she thinks its ok to be blatanly disrespectful to me and then pretend there's nothing wrong and thinks that Wizard is going to talk to her...Oh the stories I have about her; I learn more and more everyday....mommy and daddy bought her a house, a car and she smoked it all way...or shot it in her arm...I can't remember what drug she's addicted to but she's in and out of rehab alot and now she is pregnant, due in April; she emails the Wizard regularly to give updates on how she and her baby are doing, he doesn't respond. I emailed her once when she thought it would be a good idea to reach out to me and blame my husband for their fall out and I quietly put her in her place and she hasn't bothered me since, LOL...i should post that email after altering a few things....I think I will...entertaining family let me tell you! I LOVE Wizard's dad though, tough guy but full of love for his children and grandchildren!
Ok, that's all for the moment...not real exciting huh but our story nonetheless!
Love
Dorothy
Tin Man's lax game was fun as it was an inter-team game and Tin Man's team won, not sure by how much but they did and better yet he got a lot of playing time which was a good surprise to him. Munchkin was super good basically just ran up and down the hill at the field the whole time and planted 'trees' (grass) in my chair and watered them with my keys, LOL He's one funny kid! After the lax game we headed to grannies for my brother's birthday, good times. TinMan and Munchkin were pretty funny on the way there...just playing with each other, you'd never know there were 13 years between them :) Once we got there the fun really began, Munchkin LOVES grannies, there's a sand box with 'diggers' and lots of room to run, two dogs and a slide oh and trampoline :) He bounced, dug, ran and slid for a solid hour and then slept the whole way home!
We arrived home to a clean house :) I love it when Wizard surprises me and does 'chores', it makes me feel loved and more like I have a partner than just a husband! It's nice to have help! Wizard and I decided that we would take Lion, Scarecrow and Munchkin to the $1.50 movies...or $2 movie since the price went up....Lion and Scarecrow went to see Bride Wars and Wizard, Munchkin and I went to see Marley and Me...definite owner! I LOVED the movie, it was so awesome, not just the story of the dog and his owner or companion but the whole family! GREAT MOVIE! Munchkin was REALLY GOOD, no talking, whining or crying at all....I was so proud of him! Lion and Scarecrow were good too and enjoyed their movie. OH, Munchkin started giggling whenever the couple would kiss...how funny...gonna have to watch out for that one!
I have to admit that I was really tense at the thought of all of us going to the movies, but I relaxed a bit after we were all settled. It was a nice outting and I didn't feel like I had to do it all...that's one thing the book Step Motherhood is teaching me, I don't have to do it all! I'm a control freak by nature and I like things organized, neat and tidy so if I have a choice of teaching or doing; I'll do it myself instead of worrying about whether its done my way or not...something I'm slowly learning to let go of...hard but I'm moving in the right direction. Watching Marley and Me also taught me to let Wizard do more with the kids, I tend to step in if he's not doing it my way...much like Jen did to Owen when he's trying to change their middle son's diaper. Life is a learning experience that's for sure!
So now it's Sunday...drop off day and also another softball practice for Scarecrow and Wizard. they have to travel an hour away to practice and it's a pretty long practice; four hours, they only practice once a month. So...they left at 11am and won't be home until 6pm.....in the past Wizard has asked me to drop off Lion and Munchking to WWW but today he said she could wait until he was able to bring them home; I simply said Thank You! I really meant it too.
Drop off for me is hard for me because I have been harboring so much hate for WWW in the past six months, not sure why but I am and I'm slowly stepping back from certain things until I get it under control. Not to mention there are things that are NOT in my 'job' description and pickup/drop off is one of them! However, in Wizard's 'defense' I've never said i hated it, i just always bitched and something that we've both learned in the last week is that we need to LISTEN to each other more, not just yell or bitch but really LISTEN espeically when it comes to the children. I have a habit of shutting down when he tries to talk about Tyler and he has a habit of getting angry and yelling when I try to talk about any of his kids...especially Lion. His defense is always 'they get good grades and play sports' and my rebuttal is always 'getting good grades and playing sports doesn't make you a good person' and this argument has been going on for about two months now and I'm really glad that we're agreeing to work on communicating regarding our kids. This is our biggest issue! I've explained that he really needs to listen because if he doesn't; like in the past I won't talk and lately I haven't been talking and he's realized that...so cross your fingers! I'm really working on not letting things get to me so easily...I can go from 0 to bitch in about two seconds!
That's been the weekend, nothing overly eventful but life just the same. I'm doing laundry, Lion is out side with her Best Munchkin and Munchkin is napping so it's nice and quiet!
OHHHHHHHHHHH can't believe I forgot this!!! Wizards SIL (Wicked Witch of the East) stopped by to deliver Girl Scout Cookies from his niece; I haven't seen her since our wedding and the ONLY reason she came to our wedding is because Wizards parents were going to be there and she wanted to remian in their good graces....they have money and she wants some of it when they die...whatever! So, Wizard didn't leave money so I had to write a check; she did not step inside our house until I told her she could come in...now 1. I'm surprise she didn't have her daughter drop off the cookies and 2. she knows I hate her...but I'm good at being civil; i have lots of pratice with WWW; so I invited WWE so I could write the check...she made small talk but whatever...she is as bad as WWE if not worse, she befriended me and then stabbed me in the back; she's BFF's with WWW after she said so many awful and mean things about her and WWW about WWE...they're two peas in a pod and they can have each other! Maybe Wizard's bipolar nut job of a sister will join them considering she thinks its ok to be blatanly disrespectful to me and then pretend there's nothing wrong and thinks that Wizard is going to talk to her...Oh the stories I have about her; I learn more and more everyday....mommy and daddy bought her a house, a car and she smoked it all way...or shot it in her arm...I can't remember what drug she's addicted to but she's in and out of rehab alot and now she is pregnant, due in April; she emails the Wizard regularly to give updates on how she and her baby are doing, he doesn't respond. I emailed her once when she thought it would be a good idea to reach out to me and blame my husband for their fall out and I quietly put her in her place and she hasn't bothered me since, LOL...i should post that email after altering a few things....I think I will...entertaining family let me tell you! I LOVE Wizard's dad though, tough guy but full of love for his children and grandchildren!
Ok, that's all for the moment...not real exciting huh but our story nonetheless!
Love
Dorothy
Friday, March 6, 2009
The Lion's Den...
...sometimes that's what I think my home is when my stepdaughter doesn't get her way. Now, she is 11 and I remember being 11 and thinking that all my mom (because I didn't know my dad then) was just being 'mean' but the reality was she was loving and protecting me and looking out for my best interests most of the time OR she just wanted to spend quality time with me....so I get it but what I don't get and will NOT tolerate are dirty looks and smartass remarks, just try me.
That's what happened tonight when Miss Lion was told she was not allowed to go ice skating with her friends tomorrow. As a 'rule' ice skating is a no for the athletic minded Wizard, my darling Wizard invests lots of time and money in athletics, more specifically softball and soccer for Miss Lion and so when Miss Lion askes to do something that could potentially injure her...the answer is NO. Now seeing as how I contribute to the 3600/year we spend on athletics for our children I'm all for a no, that might be wrong in some people's eyes but whatever...so tonight when she was told no she called one of her Munckin friends and proceeded to be a smartass regarding our decision I well...did what I do best...I snapped...told her not to be rude, she tried to explain her way out of it as she usually does and usually gets away with it but not this time...this time I said (with glee, sorry but I was gleeful...is that even a word) don't talk like that about you father, he said no and the answer is no...her response was a snide look and 'I'm not'...if you know me, you know I DO NOT take kindly to disrespectfulness...looks, words, none of it...and so told her if she looked at me like that again I was going to smack her mouth (not a movie slap in the face smack but more like a 'bop') she gave me a blatant dirty look.....UGH...it took just about everything I had not to go up the stairs and 'bop' her....but I didn't, I reminded her again not to give me dirty looks and then she got all innocent, thinking that daddy would come to her rescue...which he did not.....which was truly in both their best intrests.
After that incident I was over the Lion for the day...and sadly, I had only been home for 30 mins...that's it 30 mins and I allowed my night to be ruined :( One of the reasons I started this blog is hopefully it will be somewhat of a savior for me and our blended family venting and forcing me to see all sides as well as the positive sides of our family....I love them but sometimes I'm not 'in love' with them. So tonight was not an in love night for Miss Lion. Good thing that had hitting league tonight so they've been gone since 6pm and won't be home until after 9pm. So...the Wizard decieded it was time to explain the reasoning behind his no which was fine to me considering I didn't have to be a part of the converstaion. I guess it went well because neither child seemed mad after the chat. Miss Scarecrow gave me a kiss bye and went on her way...Miss Lion..well she didn't come near me and that was fine with me.
Mr. Tin Man is at lacrosse for another 15 mins and the Munchkin and i will have to pick him up. Tin Man has been decent, he has a speech in Spanish on Monday that I'm stressing over so he's on edge a tad since he's going to my mom's (he lived there for 13 years and now goes back once a month and talks to her daily...i'm sure at some point there will be a very long post about that whole situation)....so anyway I'm stressing about this Spanish speech and he thinks I'm silly. But he's not doing so hot in Spanish or Biology so I have a right to stress. Oh well.
Munchkin and I have really not done much, oh wait....I take that back! Glenda had a doctor's appt. this afternoon so she left at noon and Munchkin spent the rest of the day that the office with the Wizard, LOL So funny some of the things that went on today in his office....first the Wizard's assistant wanted to give Munchkin gum...he's 3, LOL Wizard said no, LOl Funny, so then Wizard was on the phone and his assistant very focused and Munchkin went back to the water cooler and then there was water all over the floor, cute little guy even tried to clean it up with paper towels...when the Wizard told me the story he laughed about it so that was a true test that it wasn't so bad. Then Munchkin fell out of a chair, meaning he flipped over, LOL I guess he didn't get hurt but he did give the wall in daddy's office a 'boo boo' and then...OMG this last part is truly the best...absolute BEST....the Wizard is on the phone and Munchkin says...into the phone according to my husband DADDDDDD I GOTTA POOP, DAAADDDD I GOTTA POOOPPPP....Oh it was the funniest story I've heard in a long time and came at the perfect time...right after Lion had upset me...so that's good.
I have to give a shout out to one of the Tuesday's who just got engaged tonight....Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm truly happy for you!
That's what happened tonight when Miss Lion was told she was not allowed to go ice skating with her friends tomorrow. As a 'rule' ice skating is a no for the athletic minded Wizard, my darling Wizard invests lots of time and money in athletics, more specifically softball and soccer for Miss Lion and so when Miss Lion askes to do something that could potentially injure her...the answer is NO. Now seeing as how I contribute to the 3600/year we spend on athletics for our children I'm all for a no, that might be wrong in some people's eyes but whatever...so tonight when she was told no she called one of her Munckin friends and proceeded to be a smartass regarding our decision I well...did what I do best...I snapped...told her not to be rude, she tried to explain her way out of it as she usually does and usually gets away with it but not this time...this time I said (with glee, sorry but I was gleeful...is that even a word) don't talk like that about you father, he said no and the answer is no...her response was a snide look and 'I'm not'...if you know me, you know I DO NOT take kindly to disrespectfulness...looks, words, none of it...and so told her if she looked at me like that again I was going to smack her mouth (not a movie slap in the face smack but more like a 'bop') she gave me a blatant dirty look.....UGH...it took just about everything I had not to go up the stairs and 'bop' her....but I didn't, I reminded her again not to give me dirty looks and then she got all innocent, thinking that daddy would come to her rescue...which he did not.....which was truly in both their best intrests.
After that incident I was over the Lion for the day...and sadly, I had only been home for 30 mins...that's it 30 mins and I allowed my night to be ruined :( One of the reasons I started this blog is hopefully it will be somewhat of a savior for me and our blended family venting and forcing me to see all sides as well as the positive sides of our family....I love them but sometimes I'm not 'in love' with them. So tonight was not an in love night for Miss Lion. Good thing that had hitting league tonight so they've been gone since 6pm and won't be home until after 9pm. So...the Wizard decieded it was time to explain the reasoning behind his no which was fine to me considering I didn't have to be a part of the converstaion. I guess it went well because neither child seemed mad after the chat. Miss Scarecrow gave me a kiss bye and went on her way...Miss Lion..well she didn't come near me and that was fine with me.
Mr. Tin Man is at lacrosse for another 15 mins and the Munchkin and i will have to pick him up. Tin Man has been decent, he has a speech in Spanish on Monday that I'm stressing over so he's on edge a tad since he's going to my mom's (he lived there for 13 years and now goes back once a month and talks to her daily...i'm sure at some point there will be a very long post about that whole situation)....so anyway I'm stressing about this Spanish speech and he thinks I'm silly. But he's not doing so hot in Spanish or Biology so I have a right to stress. Oh well.
Munchkin and I have really not done much, oh wait....I take that back! Glenda had a doctor's appt. this afternoon so she left at noon and Munchkin spent the rest of the day that the office with the Wizard, LOL So funny some of the things that went on today in his office....first the Wizard's assistant wanted to give Munchkin gum...he's 3, LOL Wizard said no, LOl Funny, so then Wizard was on the phone and his assistant very focused and Munchkin went back to the water cooler and then there was water all over the floor, cute little guy even tried to clean it up with paper towels...when the Wizard told me the story he laughed about it so that was a true test that it wasn't so bad. Then Munchkin fell out of a chair, meaning he flipped over, LOL I guess he didn't get hurt but he did give the wall in daddy's office a 'boo boo' and then...OMG this last part is truly the best...absolute BEST....the Wizard is on the phone and Munchkin says...into the phone according to my husband DADDDDDD I GOTTA POOP, DAAADDDD I GOTTA POOOPPPP....Oh it was the funniest story I've heard in a long time and came at the perfect time...right after Lion had upset me...so that's good.
I have to give a shout out to one of the Tuesday's who just got engaged tonight....Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm truly happy for you!
Quote from Wicked Stepmom
"People who DON'T know that there is no biological relationship between us and just assume, by very presence, that there MUST be.Secretly, I like it. Not just because they unknowingly STICK IT to Maleficent, but also because it reaffirms my efforts at creating a unified home, free from the toxic mine-VS-yours, us-VS-them, step VS bio VS half attitudes.Others don't see it.And I LOVE that.All they see is a family.Parents and children.As it should be. "
and yes, that is how it should be
and yes, that is how it should be
Welcome to Oz
Where to start? Where is Oz...well that's for me to know and you to figure out if you really want...have fun. I plan to tell the story of my blended family's life.
Introductions:
I'm Dorothy, 34 years old and pretty much all over the place at this point in my life. Once strong, confident, happy go lucky I'm now confused, insecure and bitchy...yes I said bitchy.
The Wizard, my husband of 8months and father of three..well four if you count the Tin Man (my son), successful business man on many levels, great lover, great father with emotions and passions coming and going on regular intervals....just wait, you're in for the ride of your life.
Tin Man, my 16 yr old son who up until 2 years ago lived with my mother and step-father....long story really short, I was 17 when I gave birth and 19 when I made the decision that my son deserved better than any 19 year old could give. He has been my light and love for so very many years and he's been the only steady man in my life for all the years of his life.
Lion, 11 going on 20 stepdaughter, who loves to shop, play sports and gossip. Love her to pieces 90% of the time but there are moments where we really clash.
Scarecrow, soon to be 9 yr old stepdaughter and my unlikely ally. I love this little one even though she challenges me in new ways; she is the skater dude, athletic girl in the house.
Munchkin, the youngest of the four and he'll be four in a few months, shortly after our 1st wedding anniversary. He's the clown of the group, always entertaining, he loves all of us equally....it's really amazing!
Wicked Witch of the West (or East or wherever the hell she is)....Ok, I'll be nice since this is the first post. Best description, bipolar, victim who loves to spend money like it comes out of a faucet. I was nice!
Glenda has been our nanny for almost two years, the first one didn't have the strength to handle the Lion and the Scarecrow who if you let them will bulldoze you. But Glenda has lasted nicely, we've had our ups and downs and difficulties but she's good, really good and she provides something that the Wizard, Witch and I cannot, a constant prescence; she travels between homes since the Wizard and the Witch have shared parenting (7 days 'on' and 7 days 'off'). She is also a spy for me :)
There you have it, the brief introduction to what will be a very interesting story....
Introductions:
I'm Dorothy, 34 years old and pretty much all over the place at this point in my life. Once strong, confident, happy go lucky I'm now confused, insecure and bitchy...yes I said bitchy.
The Wizard, my husband of 8months and father of three..well four if you count the Tin Man (my son), successful business man on many levels, great lover, great father with emotions and passions coming and going on regular intervals....just wait, you're in for the ride of your life.
Tin Man, my 16 yr old son who up until 2 years ago lived with my mother and step-father....long story really short, I was 17 when I gave birth and 19 when I made the decision that my son deserved better than any 19 year old could give. He has been my light and love for so very many years and he's been the only steady man in my life for all the years of his life.
Lion, 11 going on 20 stepdaughter, who loves to shop, play sports and gossip. Love her to pieces 90% of the time but there are moments where we really clash.
Scarecrow, soon to be 9 yr old stepdaughter and my unlikely ally. I love this little one even though she challenges me in new ways; she is the skater dude, athletic girl in the house.
Munchkin, the youngest of the four and he'll be four in a few months, shortly after our 1st wedding anniversary. He's the clown of the group, always entertaining, he loves all of us equally....it's really amazing!
Wicked Witch of the West (or East or wherever the hell she is)....Ok, I'll be nice since this is the first post. Best description, bipolar, victim who loves to spend money like it comes out of a faucet. I was nice!
Glenda has been our nanny for almost two years, the first one didn't have the strength to handle the Lion and the Scarecrow who if you let them will bulldoze you. But Glenda has lasted nicely, we've had our ups and downs and difficulties but she's good, really good and she provides something that the Wizard, Witch and I cannot, a constant prescence; she travels between homes since the Wizard and the Witch have shared parenting (7 days 'on' and 7 days 'off'). She is also a spy for me :)
There you have it, the brief introduction to what will be a very interesting story....
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